13th May 2008
Our great state of Washington claims to practice family law and collect child support because its “about the children.” Yet its really not about the children, its only about COD (children of divorce) who are subject to a parenting plan and child support order in our state. Other children, sometimes referred to as children from other relationships or dependents not subject to a current court order are often ignored when child support negotiations are underway.
There is nothing in our state law which requires family court to count or even consider these “other” children.
How do you feel about that? What is it like to know that [for those who are moms] your child doesn’t count in the eyes and laws in our state? Not such a “child friendly” state any longer is it? Good schools and parks mean much less when your children’s father can’t afford to contribute to their upbringing because the only kids that count are his “first” children or his children from a divorce, subject to a court order for child support. What happens when your husband has a court order which requires a substantial portion of his income to go to another household, yet there are no limits or standards with which to judge his required contribution for your bios together?
I do not know, because I am not a bio mother, but I know from the perspective of being the majority contributor to the household due to my husband’s overly-heavy, financially draining, waaaaaay-too-inflated-for-ONE-child, massive child support burden. I carry the lion’s share of the financial burden now and I would if we had a child. And I wonder and worry about this constantly…..why, why wouldn’t my child count, not as “second child” but as an EQUAL and important member of society and of my husband’s household?
If you are not aware, this and other child support issues are being discussed now, by those who would present to the Senators and Representatives a bill which would agree with the status quo….that your kids DON’T count and are not equal. They are basically saying that other children, subsequent children, are less deserving and less valuable.
Can you live with that? I can’t. No way. If this makes you mad, let me know. Together we CAN do something about this insult to our children.
If you were to comment to lawmakers about this injustice, what would you say? How do you think the family courts should consider subsequent children, children from other relationships? I personally think that for starters, those on the committee, those making laws and passing bills, all of our experts and legislators can only start by viewing all children as equal and that means children of divorce, subsequent children and the whole family, not just those subject to a court order.